CHAPTER 49

"Did you get my flowers?"

"Yes. Thank you."

Trevor Abbott was one of those men who drew attention. He was strikingly handsome and exceedingly vain. His vanity was not only physical but psychological, as well. He required, and usually received, great doses of flattery and envy from others, which helped feed his sense of superiority. Over the years, his persona had garnered a distinct edge of power, which he didn't deserve but used anyway. He was the picture of perfection and charm. Only those who knew him well realized that beneath the twelve-hundred dollar suits, sculpted body and capped teeth, lay a stony heart, a soulless spirit and a shallow sense of integrity. Connie gazed at him across the small table, wondering how she could have been so blind. It made her ashamed to think she had been that desperate for love and that stupid to believe he could give it to her.

Their business had been concluded fairly quickly. Trevor had made it sound like this meeting was necessary but, in truth, it wasn't. All she had to so was sign over the papers which would release her portion of their rent-controlled apartment to him. The meeting was a false pretense.

"So, I hear that Plymouth may be signing Cornwell. That's good, isn't it? You going to edit for her? I don't know how you'll have time - I hear that your authors didn't like you being away much..."

Trevor wasn't just making small talk. He was gathering information. He already had some he had gathered from an easily flattered assistant that he had cozied up to not long after Connie left. It was from this ambitious assistant that he heard the rumor of Connie's new 'relationship' with Kevin Richardson. Connie was special to Trevor, not that he was madly in love with her. He'd never been madly in love with anyone. He would have never allowed himself to lose control like that but when Connie finally found the courage to walk out, his ego had been wounded. No one walked out on Trevor Abbott - especially someone who was...defective...

Connie was making a stab at civility but the fact was that she was uneasy in Trevor's company. He was being too 'pleasant'. This couldn't last.

"The writer's whined a little at first," she replied. "They complained to Stephen some and he panicked but we're straight now. All authors have this fear of abandonment. I think I managed to convince them that I could take care of them in Florida, or wherever. Stephen's okay - they're okay."

Trevor immediately picked up the key element of Connie's statement. Take care of them in Florida?. His eyes narrowed involuntarily.

"Florida? What about Florida?" he asked innocently. He knew who was in Florida.

"I may be working from there for a while. I'm going back this week."

Trevor deliberately began his trademark condescending chuckle. Connie couldn't hear it but that didn't mean she couldn't understand it. He was baiting her.

"Oh, Connie..." he sighed, shaking his head in mock concern. "I heard about you and that pop singer. Honey, why do you do this to yourself? This guy's a notorious player and you've known him for a few weeks. Now you're about to turn your life upside down and move yourself fifteen hundred miles away. What do you think you have in common with a singer, for God's sake? You can't even hear the son of a bitch..."

"Shut-up, Trevor!" she spat. "You don't know Kevin and you sure as hell don't know me! What I do is none of your business any more!"

Connie threw her napkin on the table and pushed her chair away. She refused to let Trevor get to her this way. It made her sick to think that she had ever been with him at all. She had stood and made a move to step past him when he grabbed her wrist, forcing her to stay at his side. He was pulling at her arm - pulling her down to his face so he could whisper his nastiness to her eyes.

"Are you faking it for him, Connie?" he hissed under his breath. "That's the only way you'll keep any man interested, you know..." Trevor's lips curled into a sadistic smile. "Does he know that you're-shall we say...'disfunctional'? That you're afraid of the dark? That you can't cum?" He brought her knuckles to his mouth and brushed them across his lips. His next remark was sinister and carried with it an implied threat. "That's something he should know, don't you think, sweetheart? Maybe I should talk to him for you... Explain your 'problem'..."

Their faces were only inches apart. The exchange, although unheard by other diners, was causing some interest in the room. Waiters hovered close by, fearing a scene. Connie didn't care. Her eyes sparked triumphantly as she burst Trevor's bubble of conceit and assumption.

"Funny thing, Trevor," she volleyed, "I don't seem to have that 'problem' with him. He takes me places I didn't know existed. He's passionate and kind and..." Connie twisted her wrist free as her face reddened with anger. "...whatever fears and weaknesses I might have don't turn him on!"

Trcvor's smile faded quickly at her remarks, but he insisted on injecting her with another touch of poison by having the final word. As Connie began to march away, he raised his voice, not caring what others in the room might hear or think. For one split second, his words froze her heart.

"Don't be too sure about that, baby! Don't be too sure...."

*****

It had been a busy week so far for Kevin. He had taken care of personal business in Orlando, cleaned his house from top to bottom and restocked the fridge and pantry. He performed all of these chores with a light heart, humming as he dusted and smiling with satisfaction as he surveyed the results of his carpentry project. He had been given no reason to believe that Connie would not be coming back to him this week. She would have let him know if there was a problem.

He partied with friends on Wednesday night and didn't get home until four in the morning. He had been drunk as hell. It was good that he hadn't been driving. Although he was dead tired, he didn't sleep for very long - just a few hours. Excitement proved to be a good antidote for a drunken stupor and he rose early and headed back to Clearwater. The grove house was beautiful but he would be glad when he could be in his own home, alone with Connie.

The last thing he did before he left was change the sheets on his bed. He had thought about putting flowers on her pillow but reconsidered. It would still be two or three days before they came back here. Dead flowers on silk sheets probably wouldn't make a great impression... So he settled on candles - lots of candles. After he gave the bedroom a final once over, he nodded, left and headed south in his black truck. It still had the ding in the side but Kevin didn't really care anymore.

*****

Funny how things can turn on you - how a day that starts off so well can become pure and utter shit.

Kevin was singing along with the Foo Fighters CD as his speedometer crept up to eighty mph. With any luck, he should be in Clearwater by two, which would give him time to unwind and catch up on some sleep before the meeting with Jeffrey later tonight. Time to start planning another tour... Little did Kevin know that as he ran through a mental checklist, Brandi was flying through Arkansas air space en route to Florida.

Brandi's flight was scheduled to land in Tampa at 2:15 and she hoped to be at the grove house an hour later. As the plane banked towards the sun, she lifted her hand and let the light play off of the stone that adorned her left ring finger. Up until recently, she had been satisfied in her relationship with Kevin, such as it was. It was a convenient partnership for both of them, however there had been a shift in the comfort level and that had made Brandi a little uneasy. Even before this 'Connie person' had entered the scene, Kevin had begun to seem a little restless. Brandi hadn't thought that much about it at the time but now she was beginning to wonder if he had been growing weary of the status quo. Brandi wasn't exactly in a constant state of excitement over Kevin either, but she'd be damned if she was willing to give up a two year investment without putting up a fight. She wasn't getting any younger but the up and coming starlets were. She had made an investment and expected a payoff.

Their sexual relationship was perfunctory, at best - what there was of it. They each scratched an itch and that was about it. Kevin never kissed her anymore. That bothered her until she realized that, for her anyway, the benefits of security far outweighed the sweetness of intimacy. Besides, Kevin was good in bed. She always got hers even if it lacked a certain intensity. Brandi refused to imagine what making love with Kevin could be like. They'd only had sex.

When people had asked her about Kevin - innocent questions that had probed the nature of their relationship - she tried to come up with some sort of explanation they would understand. Sad as it was, she had only come up with one comparison. It was almost as if they were in a scouting program together. They had entered the relationship out of a common need for companionship and had progressed through the ranks, earning various badges along the way, as a team as well as separately. 'Sex' badges had come easily but the 'Love' badge had been elusive and Brandi had now decided that it was time to skip that one and move on to the 'Commitment' badge. She knew in her heart that they would never make it to the rank of Eagle Scout but that was unimportant now. The quiet nobility of a deep and genuine love was not as beneficial or exciting as the perceived glamour of their rise through the ranks.

Chapter 50

Connie shook her head as a smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. Her thoughts were unkind but she embraced them with a kind of warped anticipation. I hope he's been as miserable as I've been... They had both been holding back but she knew that Kevin had only been following her lead. He was giving her a little space but not without some misgivings. He had been unusually tolerant considering that he tended to see things in black and white. Kevin had little patience for the middle ground.

A couple across the room was engaged in a heated argument. The woman was angry because the man had been flirting with a cocktail waitress the night before. Connie couldn't hear them, of course, but they weren't speaking, anyway. It was a deaf couple - signing their fury into the air for all to see but for few to understand. The silent screamers both wore wedding rings. He called her a bitch. She countered by forming a circle with her left thumb and index finger, sticking her right index finger through the circle and then pointing at his face. You didn't have to be deaf to read that universal sign... 'Fuck you!'

Connie's eyes glazed over a bit. The sight of the deaf couple reminded her of conversations and arguments she'd had with other non-hearing friends. Much of the deaf population had, over the years, formed into a type of separate community. Many of these people had grown almost militant in their beliefs that hearing impaired people should 'stick with their own' and often classified themselves as a sub-culture. This idea was not unlike racial segregation - at least as far as relationships went. This groundswell of 'disabled pride' had grown surprisingly strong and espoused the notion that the deaf should maintain sexual and marital relationships with other deaf people. What they were saying factored out to the simple belief that serious male/female relationships never last when one partner can hear and the other cannot. Eventually guilt, impatience, resentment and disgust replaced the initial attraction. Very few mixed couple survived these differences. The underlying message was clear: Love does not conquer all. Avoid pain.

Connie's situation was a little different because up until a few years ago, she could hear. When she thought about that time in her life, the memories were peppered with sound bytes. She vividly remembered pajama parties where she and her friends would dance to Van Halen's 'Jump', he mother's laugh at some silly joke - even her brothers' belching contests. She had fallen asleep to the sounds of chirping crickets in the summertime. She hadn't been afraid of the dark then. Most of all, she remembered singing. Connie had been quite a good singer, in fact, in a folksy sort of way. She still had the twelve-string her parents had surprised her with one Christmas. It had been an inexpensive model but it made Connie feel like a pro. She taught herself to play and often performed in local shows and school sponsored events. Her music teacher had called her 'Little Joanie' after Joan Baez - their voices had been so similar. Connie hadn't known who Joan Baez was and had rushed to the local record store to find a Baez CD. It had to be ordered. How ironic that she had fallen in love with a musician. She, too, had nurtured musical dreams at one time. It seemed like a lifetime ago. It wasa lifetime ago...

Connie smiled once again as she considered the quirky games fate plays with us. She was snapped out of her reverie by a gentle tap on her shoulder. When she looked up, a pleasant young woman was mouthing instructions.

"First class is boarding now, ma'am. We'll be taking off in approximately ten minutes. After a brief stop in Charlotte, the plane will go straight on to Tampa. Arrival time is 3:20"...

Connie nodded and rose from her seat. Kevin will be so surprised...He thinks I'm coming tomorrow...

*****

Brandi sighed and rummaged through her purse, looking for her checkbook. She had stuck her bank statement in there and boredom had forced her to check her account. She rarely bothered. This was merely a desperate attempt to kill a little time. Her checkbook opened to the duplicate of the last check she had written. She frowned as she read the entry.

To: Eric T. Dougan for TV coverage. Amount: $6,000.00

Eric Dougan was a relatively new reporter for 'Access Hollywood'. Unconfirmed reports of Kevin Richardson's engagement to Brandi Prosser would be announced tonight on the broadcast along with about thirty seconds of footage showing Brandi 'running away' from a cameraman. She scowled, remembering the difficulties she had encountered. That know-nothing little prick, Dougan, hadn't even been interested in the 'exclusive' and after Brandi had convinced him that a Backstreet Boy's engagement was newsworthy, the bastard had still wanted confirmation from Kevin. It had cost her $5,000.00 to keep him from picking up the phone to call The Firm and another thousand for her thirty seconds of film. Stupid cameraman! She had gone through seven takes before he got it right. She had to be in the shot long enough so that her identity could be verified but she had to make it appear as if she had been ambushed. That had been easy enough but the stupid jerk behind the lens kept failing to get a good shot of the ring. Finally, Brandi had resorted to putting her left hand across her mouth as she 'gasped in surprise' - feigning shock that the 'secret' had been discovered. The memory irritated her and she slammed her checkbook closed before taking a quick glance at her bank statement.

Her lips curled into a tight smile. Kevin's business manager was always so prompt. His monthly deposit of $5,000.00 to her account had been made one week ago. For a moment she wondered if her 'allowance' from Kevin would stop after they got married. No way... In fact, I think I'll ask for a raise. Weddings are expensive...

*****

The house was eerily quiet when Kevin arrived. He was almost relieved. He was so damn tired, all he wanted to do was crash. His lack of sleep and hangover seem to catch up with him about the time he hit the causeway and he wasn't in the mood to chat or play catch-up with the others.

"What are you doing back here?"

Kevin spun around to face Leighanne, who had appeared at the top of the stairs. He couldn't help but stare. Leigh was wearing a raggedy flannel robe, which she began to pinch together at the neckline, decidedly uncomfortable at Kevin's intense gaze. He didn't speak. He didn't look away.

"Well?"

Kevin stammered for a moment as he fought for some semblance of control and normalcy. "Uh... came back early...," he mumbled. "Where is everybody?"

"Everybody's gone. Howie went to see his brother. Adam left for New York this morning. Hannah went with AJ and Amanda to Ybor City and Brian and Nick took off for Busch Gardens." She paused as Kevin cocked his head slightly, still staring. "Kevin, what in the hell is wrong with you? What are you looking at?" Leigh tightened the sash on her robe. She seemed a little nervous. "Don't you go getting any ideas just because no one's here..."

The remark was enough to break Kevin's gaze. He rolled his eyes, about to issue a sarcastic reply, but then thought better of it. He was too beat to battle Leigh this afternoon.

"Leigh..." he drawled flatly, "What in the hell do you have on your head and face?"

Leighanne looked puzzled for an instant and then her hands flew up to her head. She looked like she wanted to disappear.

"Oh my God! I forgot! I heard someone come in and I knew everybody was gone and I didn't know who was coming in here because I thought you weren't coming back until tomorrow and..."

"LEIGH!" Kevin shouted, halting her sudden hysterics, "What is that crap all over you?"

Kevin was once again staring the indignant figure that stood at the top of the stairs. Leigh had some kind of plastic thing wrapped around her head. It must have had little holes punched in it, because these wisps of hair jutted out from all over the plastic sort of like little, thin pony tails. Wrapped around each of these little 'tails' was what looked like aluminum foil. Kevin couldn't decide whether Leigh reminded him of some kind of futuristic homing device or a psychedelic Christmas tree. As If the head-gear wasn't bad enough, there was some kind of white stuff painted between her eyebrows and lids and some blue gunk smeared on the rest of her face. It had cracks in it.

"Jesus! Can't a girl have any privacy? I'm taking care of some 'female business', that's all!"

"Hey, I didn't come bustin' down your door, remember?" Kevin stormed up the stairs and past Leighanne on the way to his room. He stopped at the door, suddenly in need of further explanation. "I thought 'female business' was conducted...well - 'south of the border', anyway..."

"God! You are so gross, Kevin! I just wanted to have a little girly time while Brian wasn't here, that's all!"

"I'd say that was pretty considerate of you to wait until Brian was gone, Leigh. It's just a shame that Brian's paying forty bucks to go on a few scary rides with Nick when you could scare the shit out of both of them for free!"

"I hate you!"

"Yeah, I know..."

Kevin opened his door and was about to step inside when Leighanne offered him a small bit of 'non-information'.

"Kevin?..." she asked timidly.

"Yeah?" he sighed, turning back to the cracked, blue face in the hallway.

"I tried to find Brandi while you were gone. I don't know where she is and she's not returning my calls." Leigh's tone was almost contrite.

"Mine either..." Kevin frowned. "Thanks for tryin', anyway."

"You're welcome..."

Leigh nodded and turned to go back to her room. Kevin watched her go, shrugged and closed his door, unsure of what to do next. He'd make another plan after he got some rest. He was just too tired to deal with Brandi right now.