CHAPTER 79

The hum of the crowd could be heard even in the bowels of the venue. They would be onstage soon and still, Connie hadn’t shown. She had flown into New York that morning for her scheduled meetings and went straight from the airport to the publishing house. That was okay because the group hadn’t arrived in the city until almost noon and they would be busy for the entire afternoon, but now it was late. Kevin wanted to know where in the hell she was.

He was frustrated beyond belief. After a few days on the road, he had adjusted somewhat to the travel and frenzy of touring and found his thoughts returning more and more to the blue-eyed redhead who was sleeping in his bed every night – without him. Lonely hotel rooms only compounded his misery, especially since he seemed to be the only male in his immediate circle who remained consistently unattached. Everything and everyone was getting on his nerves and he swore that if he heard Leighanne call Brian ‘Bri-Bear’ one more time, he was going to puke. AJ and his new ‘friend’ were annoying the shit out of him too and Kevin wondered for a moment if AJ had never not been ‘in love’. When a new roadie, recognizing in Kevin a common symptom of life on the road, tried to help him out by offering to procure a willing groupie for him, he was rewarded by a sample of Kevin’s ‘death-ray glare’. He didn’t offer again.

Kevin’s short temper and sullenness had cause the people around him to give him a wide berth. He was being an asshole and he knew it, yet he couldn’t seem to stop himself. He’d already flipped out twice today – once when the label rep balked over Kevin’s instructions to seat Connie in the gutter tonight. By the time the screaming was over, the rep had reluctantly backed down, thanks in part to back up from Nick and Howie. Kevin was determined not to play the ‘free and single’ game anymore. It had already proved to be difficult and hazardous after only one attempt.

His second rage had occurred when the group was leaving the short meeting. Kevin’s fuse had already been shortened but was pulled out completely when he spotted Terry Mitchell, standing by the elevator bank, talking to another lawyer from Jive. Terry had felt the heat of Kevin’s stare, turned to face him, and then immediately began pounding on the elevator buttons. He made his escape before Kevin could reach him and, once again, Kevin exploded. It took several minutes to calm him down, even after Jeffrey explained that Terry had relocated to New York and was working for BMG now. He had just come to the hotel to see an old friend from Jive. Despite Jeffrey’s reasonable explanation, Kevin’s whispered response had been bathed with a barely-contained fury.

“Keep that son of a bitch away from me, Jeffrey – and away from Connie – or, so help me….”

He never finished his statement. Kevin’s eyes shifted for a moment and he stared at an empty wall before taking a breath and stomping off down the hallway, leaving his bandmates and manager staring at his heels. The thick silence was broken when Nick made an offhanded remark, saying that Kevin really needed to get laid. It was supposed to be funny – an attempt to cut through the tension that Kevin had left in his wake - but no one laughed. They just all nodded in agreement.

Now, here he was, less than twenty minutes before showtime and still no Connie. Kevin had been looking forward to tonight – in more ways than one. It was true that he had been counting on a little sexual relief before the show, even if he had to get it in a broom closet under the stage, but he was also excited about the fact that this would be the first time Connie would see him perform. In fact, this would be Connie’s first professional concert ever.

He knew she was in town. One of the secretaries at the publishing house had left a message on Connie’s behalf, letting him know that she had arrived safely. Kevin had called the hotel ten minutes ago. She still hadn’t checked in. The only communication he’d had with her for over a week had been through emails and they had been less than satisfactory. Oh, they had been chatty…Connie had told him what she had been up to, asked the appropriate questions about the tour, told him about some damn class she had signed up for and said that she missed him. She never complained about being lonely, never said she needed him with her, never made any demands or plans for the two of them. Her ‘friendliness’ and lack of complaint had perturbed him a little.

“Let’s go guys!”

It was time. Kevin took one more look around, trying to peek around corners and down hallways. She was nowhere to be seen.

*****

Carlos spotted her standing near the freight entrance, looking all wide-eyed and lost. The intro had begun and he should have been our front but he had been delayed by a last minute mix-up with venue security personnel. He was glad he’d had to wait when he saw Connie. He could have easily missed her and she could have spent a large part of the evening wandering. He pulled a pass out of his pocket and started towards her.

The expression on her face amused him and Carlos was a man who was not easily amused. She looked confused and nervous but also excited and happy. He had overheard enough to know that this was Connie’s first real concert and the fact that she wouldn’t be able to hear it hadn’t seemed to diminish her enthusiasm at all. In that split second before she saw him approaching, she was completely unguarded, not unlike many of the twelve year olds Carlos had seen at countless ‘meet and greets’. She was making no attempt to be blase or sophisticated in these new circumstances, unlike some of Kevin’s former ‘companions’. It was too bad that Kevin was in such a pissy mood. Carlos hoped that her arrival would change that. He also hoped her arrival would provide him with a night off.

“Here – You need to wear this…”

Carlos put the corded pass over Connie’s head and tried to remain straight-faced when she lifted the plastic to examine her special VIP, ‘all-access’ documentation. The corners of her mouth curled up as she ran her finger over the group photo and then she looked up at him expectantly. You would have thought she had just been knighted by the Queen.

“I feel pounding. Have they started?”

The opening number had begun when Connie was examining her pass.

“Yeah, they just started,” Carlos nodded. “I’m gonna take you in. There’s a lot of people, so you stay right up behind me, okay?”

“Okay…” Connie agreed, matching the business-like attitude of the bodyguard.

As they started towards the arena, Carlos turned back to her, offering some additional information

“You’ll be sitting down front with Leighanne, Howie’s ‘squeeze of the week’- Tricia, some girl Nick picked up last night – don’t know her name – and AJ’s newest…..’friend’, DeeDee – or something…”

“Okay…”

At the arena entrance, Carlos stopped once more. He tried to make it a point not to butt into Kevin’s personal life but he kinda liked this red-head and thought he would give her a little tip-off. The crowd was roaring as he pushed open the final door and Carlos found himself trying to yell over the crowd, forgetting that shouting was unnecessary. His ‘tip’ was really more of a warning and consisted of four words:

“You’re late. He’s pissed.”

Chapter 80

The special effects used in this tour were much more subtle than those that had been used in previous tours and relied mainly on lighting. There was no pyro and no popping up from beneath the floor. There was some scripted interaction between the group members and some unscripted. All in all, the show was less rigid and much more personal. Reviews, so far, had been excellent and most critics, even the crusty ‘pop haters’, felt that Backstreet had reached a new level of maturity in their performance. Their selection of numbers was often pooh-poohed as being too soft, but this seemed to be a minor complaint. Comparisons to ‘n sync were almost nil because the critics no longer seemed to lump the two groups together. As one critic wrote, “It takes a great leap of imagination and integrity to compare these two Orlando based groups just as it would take a similar leap to compare K.C. and the Sunshine Band to Blind Faith.” While most younger readers had no idea who either of these bands were, people in the music business knew. More importantly, the Backstreet Boys knew and even though they felt that the analogy was way over the top, they finally received a small taste of the respect they had been craving for many years. They were still teased but the jokes suddenly became much easier to bear.

Backstreet had been a little wary of making such major changes in their show and deciding to deliberately play smaller venues was a difficult choice to make. Although the area where the audience was seated was still referred to as the arena, it was, more often than not, more like a theater. The flash had been replaced by class. Jive preferred the ‘flash’ but the group’s management had supported this decision and Jive had reluctantly relented. The upshot of this was that the label put out less and less in the form of PR for the group since they felt that their financial payoff would decrease. Backstreet was left largely to their own devices and one of those devices was to begin branching. Brian formed a production company. Howie pursued real estate interests. Kevin bought a studio and formed a label. All of the Boy’s contracted individual agents. Overall, things seemed pretty good except for the roadblocks that Jive occasionally threw their way.

The group was just ending their opening number when Connie was seated. Dee-Dee, Tricia and ‘whatshername’ smiled and nodded. Leighanne went through an assortment of reactions before she settled on saccharin. She hadn’t really seen Connie since the Brandi ‘incident’ and didn’t know how much Connie knew about her involvement. She seemed okay and Leighanne guessed that Kevin hadn’t given his deaf girlfriend the gory details regarding Leighanne’s friendship with Brandi. Leighanne frowned. She and Brian had come perilously close to a split of their own after all of that.

Connie didn’t spend any time socializing with Leigh. Her eyes darted across the stage looking for Kevin. She was so excited! Howie was talking into a mike, making chit-chat between numbers when she saw Nick grin and wave in her direction. Then he walked over to Kevin, who was standing near the other side of the stage, and tugged on his shirt sleeve. He’s gong to tell him I’m here! He looks so good up there – so…big! I can’t wait to see his face when he sees me… Howie was still talking and had been joined by AJ by the time Nick had dragged Kevin to the other side of the stage. Nick grinned and pointed to a row of seats which had been separated from those of the general audience. Connie felt her face get flush as she grinned back at the stage and raised her arm to wave.

She didn’t exactly get the response she had expected. Connie didn’t expect a big display – no blown kisses or even personal signals. She didn’t expect some grand gesture or even a big wave. What she had expected was a smile and maybe one of those wave things that Kevin does when he raises his hand and wiggles the ends of his fingers or maybe a peace sign or even a point in her direction. She felt herself rise out of her seat in anticipation as Kevin shaded his eyes, trying to pinpoint her. Then he saw her.

Connie’s smile faded as she saw Kevin’s brows furrow. Nick was still standing at his side, his hand on Kevin’s shoulder and grinning his ass off like he’d just discovered penicillin, oblivious to the expression that was forming on Kevin’s face. As Kevin’s brows dipped, so did the line of his mouth. Connie, recognizing his obvious state of annoyance, dropped her hand and crossed her arms defensively, as her smile evaporated and her lips reformed into a distinct pout. As Nick glanced back and forth between the two of them, quite puzzled, Kevin began tapping his left wrist with his right index finger.

Connie flopped back down in her seat, incredulous at the fact that Kevin had effectively scolded her in front of a theater packed to the gills with fans and then strode nonchalantly back to the far side of the stage. Four pairs of female eyes watched her expression go from petulant to pissed. Carlos had warned her that he was angry but his actions had seemed childish. She leaned past Dee-Dee and caught Leighanne’s attention.

“I’m leaving.”

Leigh began to shake her head. “NO! You can’t do that! You just got here! Kevin’s been looking for you for hours!”

“Well, he found me,” Connie scowled. “I can see he’s thrilled. He’s being shitty.”

Leighanne looked a little confused. “He’s always shitty, Connie. Loosen up. He’s had a bad day.”

“He’s gonna have a lousy night, too!” Connie spat. “I’m going!”Connie picked up her bag and grabbed her jacket.

“Where?”

This made Leighanne a little nervous. She’d never seen one of Kevin’s women go up against him before. She also knew that Kevin’s little demonstration was intended to put Connie ‘in her place’ and let her know that she had failed to meet his expectations. She suspected Connie realized this, too, and was having no part of it. Leighanne found herself feeling a speck of admiration for this fiery redhead. Kevin was tense – Connie was mad. This could be very interesting… Connie was turning to leave when Leigh realized that Connie hadn’t heard her question. She grabbed onto Connie’s purse strap and repeated her query when Connie spun around to face her.

“Where are you going?”

“I don’t know,” Connie shouted, snatching her purse from Leighanne’s grasp.

“Are you leaving the venue?”

“I don’t know.”

“Kevin will want to know…”

“He doesn’t care! He won’t even look down here, Leighanne! He’s staying at the other end of the stage!”

Leigh chewed on her thumbnail before answering Connie’s complaint.

“I think this is his way of punishing you, sort of. You know – like trying to make you feel bad for being late and all…”

“Yeah, well two can play at that game…”

Connie remained in front of her seat until Kevin couldn’t stand it anymore and cast a sideways glance down the stage, trying to spot her. She didn’t give him a chance to look away from her again. As soon as she saw his eyes fall on her, she spun on her heel and marched to the door near the stage – the one she had entered just a short time ago. She just wanted to make sure that he saw her leave.

Leighanne watched as Kevin moved back down stage, his eyes riveted to the backstage exit. What the fuck? Where the hell is she going? It was really quite amusing. Connie had stormed off to God knows where, unwilling to play the role of the remorseful Backstreet girlfriend who’s supposed to grin and bear Backstreet shittiness. Kevin was stuck up on stage in front of thousands of paying fans and had to smile and play nice, in spite of what was happening behind the scenes. Leigh Anne had seen this drama unfold dozens of times with various combinations of characters, including Brian and herself but she had never seen any girlfriend ‘shoot the bird’ at their guy – figuratively speaking, of course – and, least of all, shoot it at Kevin Richardson.

The group was totally in tune with each other, especially on stage. Leighanne saw Brian take over the mike duties when actually, it was Kevin’s turn to get up close and personal with the crowd. Brian was covering for his cousin’s sudden confusion and it took a minute or two for Kevin to get back on track. The show must go on – and so it did – with an unplanned change in the staging. Kevin had moved himself to the closer end of the stage, bumping everyone down one place and subtly positioning himself so that he could more easily see the comings and goings from the stage left doorway. There were no costume changes in this show. He was stuck.

It was difficult for Leighanne to suppress a smile.