Will You Play for Me

Tristan Trilogy - Story I

CHAPTER 46

It was a common practice for the group to fly to their first destination on tour and travel by bus afterwards. This tour would be no exception. One difference this time is that Tristan would be leaving, too - from the same place, on the same day at almost the same time. She had been scheduled for a ten city tour which she had put off until Kevin left and until she felt comfortable playing again. Her strokes and stretch were almost back to normal after months of intensive therapy, but to avoid any mistakes on stage, she would be playing "safe" pieces that sounded more complex than they were.

She would be going to Denver on the same day that the Backstreet Boys left for Charlotte, her flight leaving only one half hour before theirs. Kevin would be seeing her off this time. She had actually talked Holly into joining her for the last four dates on her schedule, both as a friend and as a partner. Tristan had a lot of leeway in what she chose to do during a performance and she had chosen to have another artist join her to play one or two numbers on stage - that other artist being Holly. Holly was practically living with Nick now. She was on extended leave from the Atlanta Symphony but Tristan knew that her heart was no longer in Atlanta. She doubted that Holly would return.

Holly was much calmer about this tour. For one thing, there had been no thought left unspoken between her and Nick and, secondly, she would be meeting him frequently on tour. But perhaps what made this whole tour the easiest for Holly is that she would be leaving with him. Amanda was going, too. Tristan was envious. They would have fun and be with the men they loved. She would be completely alone for many days until Holly met her.

Tristan had confirmed these dates months ago at a time when she was feeling noble and independent, rationalizing that she and Kevin were separate souls who each needed their space and time away. She had come to realize, however, that they were anything but separate. Kevin had been the one to burst that bubble when he finally confessed that he didn't like the idea of Tristan touring and that he wanted her with him. It was a very old-fashioned and politically incorrect attitude, but he refused to put on a show any more. Kevin was proud of Tristan and didn't want to smother her. He just didn't want her so damned far away. If she absolutely couldn't be with him, then he wanted to know that she was safe and taken care of. He thought about the dangers of the road, dangers that Tristan had already experienced. It was one more thing for him to worry about while they were separated. He wished that at least one part of his life could just be still and not in a state of constant fluctuation.

Kevin had brought home an armful of Tropicana roses the night before they were to leave Orlando. Tristan had teased him that there would be no one here to enjoy them, but he didn't care. He had brought them up to the bedroom and set them on the dresser. Their sweetness permeated the room. For the first time in her life, Tristan thought that maybe they smelled too sweet. She had felt lightheaded when she had leaned over them to drink in their fragrance.

They were awake all night, both of them feeling a heightened tension over this tour - almost a foreboding. Kevin felt the need, as he had before, to examine all of her and he did so - not in a playful or light way but very methodically and seriously, not only with his eyes or hands but also with his mouth and tongue.. All five of his senses were heightened during his gentle exploration as he smelled her skin, felt her body, watched her face and tasted every part of her. His sense of hearing was even stimulated by her deep sighs and soft moans. Kevin wanted the lights on tonight so he wouldn't miss any detail. These memories would have to hold him for awhile.

Afterward, she came to him, laying across his chest and body and looking into his face. His eyes looked heavy-lidded as he gazed at her mouth. He could see her tongue wetting the corners of her lips as she combed her fingers through his hair slowly and seductively. When she traced her finger down the side of his face to his lips, he opened his mouth and took her finger in, sucking. Then she leaned over and replaced her finger with her tongue. Her mouth was warm and wet and he noticed a slight whisper of cinnamon on her breath. It was the perfect place for his tongue to be and it fit her mouth well., like it was supposed to be there.. He thought that maybe it was. When she withdrew and moved her mouth to his neck, he moaned softly, not only because of the sensation of her mouth and tongue on him but because her hair had moved also and drifted across his chest and nipples like silk.. She still lay on top of him, slowly moving downwards, his hands on her back, guiding her and stopping her when he wanted her to linger, like now. Her tongue flicked over his nipples and then she sucked forcefully causing him to press her to him and groan her name. He was breathing heavily and had raised his knees. Tristan stayed there, stimulating his hardened buds until she felt the pressure on her back subside as his hands moved to her shoulders, coaxing her farther down still. This time, when she moved, she brought her fingers across his abs, skimming them lightly, giving him a sample of his own tortuous methods. The torture continued as she ran her hands over his hips and then down between his legs while her tongue traced the trail of fine hair that lead from his navel down to his pubic hair and finally to his manhood which fairly pulsated, engorged and swollen, begging for her touch.

"Please Tristan. Do it. Do it, baby...."

She could barely hear him. The only one of his senses working now was his sense of touch - not his but hers on him. She moved herself so that she was on her knees between his legs and gently lifted his shaft into her warm hands, caressing it slowly. He was watching her intently up until the point when her hands began to move on him and then his head fell into his pillow and she heard the sharp intake of his breath..

"Don't stop, Tris. Don't ever stop....ever...."

She smiled at him although he didn't see her through his closed eyes. His body was slick with perspiration and his hips moved up towards her in anticipation. She took a hank of her hair and used it to wipe his pre cum around the head of his penis and then she brushed his balls with her hair as she licked up the moisture she had spread.

"Sweet Jesus....!" he groaned loudly. His hip jerked upwards and she had him in her mouth. "Do me, Tristan...please..."

She raised her eyes to his face and found him watching her move on him. Perspiration had turned to sweat and she watched a bead of moisture travel down his neck to his collarbone. Tristan gently squeezed his balls in her hair and then took him completely, successfully fighting the reflex that would keep him from entering her throat.

All he could do was repeat her name over and over as she moved up and down on him, using her tongue to feel the ridge around his tip. Her tongue registered every bulging vein on his shaft. When she felt his hands pulling at her hair, she knew he was ready to explode.. She moved on him several more time, his breath getting more shallow and his moans becoming louder with each downward movement and then he froze. Clamping his hands onto her head and groaning her name loudly, she felt his ejaculate slide down her throat in intermittent bursts and then his body seemed to crumple as he relaxed his hands on her head. She withdrew slowly from him, sucking and tasting his seed as she did. She felt his hand grab her arm forcefully, yanking her up to his chest and holding her tightly against his heart. He stroked her hair and murmured to her and after a while his breathing normalized along with the grip on her body.

They lay there together for awhile saying nothing, just feeling the breezes from the window meet the draft from the ceiling fan and wash over their bodies. Blankets and sheets had long ago been kicked to the floor. They moved to their sides facing each other, legs intertwined. They didn't speak and eventually, Tristan's eyes closed. Kevin continued to stare at her and move her hair from her face. He wished that she were coming with him instead of flying to Denver. Their bags were already packed. He had never returned the pink camisole, so it would be his constant companion on this trip, too.

Kevin moved closer to her and began to rub his finger down her throat while she slept. When he heard her sigh, he moved it down to her cleavage which had grown deeper when she had moved to her side. Her breasts pressed together forming a deep cleft. When her lids fluttered open, they locked eyes and Kevin turned her over onto her back, putting his body on top of hers. He kissed her deeply and moved his body down as she had done to him, stopping only briefly at her breasts. He felt an urge to press his face into her belly. His tongue began to trace a path from one hipbone to the other and she squirmed under him, saying his name.

That simple action, calling to him during their lovemaking, did more to arouse him than anything else and he quickly spread her legs, attacking her with his tongue and lips. She was already wet for him and he felt himself tighten even more. His tongue parted her folds and then it entered her, slowing to savor her sweetness. Again, Tristan called out to him and her hips began to move. She could feel his beard against her inner thighs. Now it was her turn to sweat and when his tongue slid up, finding her sensitive spot, she ground herself against him and came with a furious shudder.. Kevin immediately returned to her opening. he wanted every drop of her tonight and he would have it.

Tristan began to whimper. She had not yet come down from her first orgasm before she felt another one building. She was excruciatingly sensitive at this point and almost anything Kevin did to her would send her over the edge again. He seemed to know this and moved his face against her rhythmically, causing her to come once more. Now she screamed. Kevin examined her closely and saw her clitoris, angry and swollen. He attacked it directly, biting gently and sucking as Tristan begged for him to stop. When she came this time her nails dug trenches into his shoulders and she tried to pry his hands from her thighs.

Kevin left her then and moved back up on her body. She was having difficulty breathing and her hair was damp. He caressed her face and whispered soothing words to her, trying to calm her, to bring her back to him.

"Kevin......"

"Shhh, baby. Come on down now....."

"I'm on fire, Kevin...."

"No, baby....You're fine....." he continued to stroke her face and then he felt her hips press against his hardness.

"Please Kevin....I want you in me...I'm so empty...."

"Let's give it a minute, Tris....."

"No, no, no!" she shouted at him, tears forming in her eyes. "Now, Kevin!"

Her need for him was urgent and he was ready to comply. He entered her with one hard thrust and began pumping into her, pounding her relentlessly while pinning her arms down above her head. She was on fire. Her heat literally engulfed him and he found that it was hard for him to catch his breath. Soon, their bodies were soaking wet again. Their eyes never left each other as fate let them reach their incredible climax together. His hands moved to hold her head and she grabbed onto his shoulders, experiencing a zenith of profound purity that neither would be able to forget.

******

They sat in the airport together waiting for Tristan's flight to be called. She carried a single Tropicana rose in her hand. They had separated themselves from the others and leaned into each other, saying little. When her flight to Denver was called, she stood and kissed him gently, brushing her rose down the side of his face. A sadness had swept over them and she turned quickly to board, not wishing to shed tears at their departure. Kevin went to the large window and stood watching her plane until it took off and then found a seat alone waiting for their flight to be called.

"God, Nick. I can't even stand to watch them," Holly stammered, wiping her eyes.

Nick had been watching Kevin and Tristan, too. The whole scene had affected him deeply as well, although he didn't understand why. Today was only the latest in dozens of tours that they had begun and the first of dozens more to come.

"Yeah, babe...I got 'ya on this one."

Holly looked up at Nick and saw that his eyes were wet, too. He put his arm around Holly's shoulders and they walked over to join the others, leaving Kevin to his reverie.

After they boarded the plane, Kevin, as was his custom, reached into his pocket to pull out a lollipop. He smiled faintly remembering the discovery in his pocket that last time he left on tour.. There were no red panties this time. He unwrapped the candy and stuck it in his mouth, pulling out of his bag the latest best-seller that Tristan had bought for him.. The book fell open naturally at its center and there he found, pressed between the pages, a Tropicana rose.

CHAPTER 47

Tristan's performances were very well received by the critics. Reviewers made a special effort to welcome her back to her career, assuming that these concerts would be a recurring event. Interviewers rarely asked her about her connection to the Backstreet Boys. In the classical world she was pretty much separated from them. Occasionally, she would run into concert goers who were well aware of her connection to Kevin and would ask her about him or the other guys. She always declined comment. There were a very few who were nasty about her relationship with Kevin, either because they were jealous or because some classical fanatics felt that she was lowering her standards to associate herself in any way with the pop faction of music. That was the most common negative reaction - never to her music but always to her personal life. Then there were the articles written without her knowledge. These were always the most scathing.

Kevin tried to keep up with any reviews or articles written about her. He was very proud, but after awhile became uneasy as well. Tristan had countered questions about the Backstreet boys with grace and humor but the same critics that categorized them had categorized her as well and seemed to accuse her of lowering herself by associating so openly with them in any ongoing way. The fact that she was living with a Backstreet Boy never turned into gossipy snippets in the high brow articles, rather these 'holier than though' types almost seemed to pity her.

When Holly joined her later, the articles became harsher. As before, their actual performances were praised but their personal associations were criticized. Now there were two of them and Tristan began to regret asking Holly to come with her. Holly handled personal questions very well, too, but she was not considered living with Nick full time. Much of this had to do with the fact that Nick was nineteen and Holly, notably, wasn't wearing a ring on her left hand. Tristan was questioned about the ring several times and finally decided it would be best for her and Kevin if she removed it during the remainder of the tour, especially in public.

Many of the articles written contained photographs of Tristan and some of Tristan and Holly together. Nick always got excited when their publicist passed such an article to him with instructions to give it to Kevin as well. The glass was always half full for Nick. He regarded his relationship with a classical artist as uplifting for his music. Kevin, on the other hand, worried that his music was degrading to Tristan on a professional level.

A national tabloid had run a photograph of Tristan and Holly with a caption that said simply "Backstreet Girls" and went on to identify them as the girlfriends of Nick Carter and Kevin Richardson. The photograph was large and in color. Both women were obviously unaware that they were being snapped. It appeared that they were shopping together, laughing and holding ice cream cones. It was while he was studying this photo that Kevin first noticed the absence of his ring on Tristan's finger. He looked back through the earlier articles that contained photographs and calculated that Tristan had stopped wearing the ring about halfway through her tour. He had spoken to her and she had never mentioned it. He found his copy of her itinerary. She would be in Boston tonight and they would be out west. He needed to talk to her about this. That ring was very significant to him and he wanted to know where it was.

Noting the time difference, Kevin decided to call Tristan before they were to go on stage. She would be finished her performance by then but not yet asleep. Tristan picked up her cell after only two beeps.

"Kevin, this better be you!" Tristan answered.

He laughed at her greeting. "Hey baby. Have you finally finished up now?"

"Yes, thank God! Christmas concert rehearsals will seem like a vacation after this."

"I really miss you..."

"I miss you, too, sweetie."

AJ walked past Kevin making kissing noises and wrapping his arms around himself, hugging his own body. The other guys, standing nearby, laughed.

"Asshole!", Kevin grinned at him.

"What?"

"Just talking to AJ, Tris."

"Ya'll aren't killing each other, are you?" she giggled.

"Nah, we're okay, but it's only been a couple of weeks. Give us time." Kevin paused, trying to coax Tristan into telling him about the ring. He decided to slide into the subject. "I've been reading your reviews. They've been pretty good, Tris. You should be proud of yourself."

"Thanks, Kevin. The critics have been kind," she responded modestly.

"There's been a few articles about you, too. With pictures..."

"Really? I haven't seen anything except that grocery store paper with the picture of Holly and me."

"Listen, baby. I couldn't help but notice that in most of the pictures you're not wearing your ring. Has it been lost or stolen or something?" Kevin asked.

"No, I have it." Tristan fingered the ring that she had put on a chain around her neck for safekeeping.

"Why aren't you wearing it, baby?" He was feeling a little edgy.

"It was becoming a distraction, Kevin. I thought that maybe I shouldn't wear it on tour."

"A distraction?.....Well, Tris....I kind of want it to distract you. I want you to remember what it means every time you look at it."

"Not a distraction to me, Kevin. A distraction to the interviewers."

Kevin was puzzled. "What do you mean?"

"They always asked me about it."

"So?" Kevin still didn't understand.

"I don't want to talk about our relationship with them, Kevin. They're so persistent! I say as little as I can," Tristan replied almost defensively.

"I don't care if you say anything about us, Tris." Tristan noticed that Kevin's voice was rising.

"I would just rather not, that's all. Our careers are independent of each other. I've heard you complain yourself about judgements that were made on things other than the music itself."

"So your association with us is a problem?" The edge was definitely pronounced now. "Is our music embarrassing to you, Tristan? Does our relationship embarrass you?"

"Of course not. Don't be paranoid! It's just that when I'm asked questions about a concert, I'd rather them be about the concert, not the Backstreet Boys."

"Gee, Tris. Why do I suddenly feel like a dirty little secret?"

"Do you really want me to discuss our personal lives?" Tristan said with some anger. "Do you really want me screaming out your name when they ask me about my love life?"

Kevin shouted into the phone. "You sure didn't seem to mind screaming out my name in bed a couple of weeks ago!"

Four pairs of eyes turned to look at him. Fuck...

"I can't believe you, Kevin!", Tristan choked. "Why don't you just get up on stage tonight and tell everybody what we do in bed!"

Kevin turned away from his bandmates and spoke more softly on the phone.

"God dammit, Tris. I'm not ashamed of us. I'm sorry as hell you are."

"I'm not ashamed, Kevin. I think you know that."

"Where's the ring, Tristan?"

"It's around my neck as close to my heart as I could get it!"

"As close as you could get it without risking your reputation as a serious musician! Hell, baby, I think you should talk about our relationship. Maybe your influence as an important and significant artist would raise us up in the eyes of the critics! You would be doing us such a favor, Tris." His sarcasm was overpowering.

Tristan was silent.

"What do 'ya say, Tris? Gonna help us out?"

She said nothing.

"TRISTAN! God dammit - are you there?" His sarcasm had turned into anger.

"Yes, Kevin...I'm here," she whispered. "Please don't scream at me anymore....I've been so tired...." she started to cry.

"Shit, baby....please don't cry...," Kevin said quietly, but not quietly enough for Nick to miss. "Look, I have to go in five minutes. I won't call you after the show, it'll be three am there by the time I get back to the hotel. You get some sleep and I'll try to call you tomorrow night in Orlando, okay?"

"Okay..." Tristan sniffled.

"Tris, please understand that it means a lot to me for you to be wearing that ring." Kevin rubbed his forehead, trying to rid himself of the headache he felt forming.

"You understand, Kevin, that it means a lot for me to wear it."

"Then put it on, baby."

No one in the audience noticed anything unusual at the show that night, but people directly involved in the production did. Kevin's head hurt and he had to go on automatic pilot that night. He wasn't quite as amiable as he usually was. Nick seemed totally indifferent to Kevin onstage. He didn't try to cavort or joke with Kevin and when Kevin tried to communicate with Nick, he was virtually ignored. It never occurred to Kevin that it was anything personal and he felt too worn out to worry about it anyway.

Kevin fell into his bed that night exhausted and found sleep right away. Tristan fell into her bed that night only to be awakened later by Holly shaking her out of a nightmare.

*****

Tristan felt obligated to tell Holly about her nightmares, since she had witnessed one first hand. It had obviously scared her badly. After Tristan had told her when and why they had started and what the doctors had said, it didn't take much for Holly to figure out that when Tristan was with Kevin, she was fine. When she wasn't and she was feeling insecure, she had the dreams. When Holly asked her who else knew about this, she was surprised to hear that only Tristan's family, Mutt Lange and now Holly knew about the dreams.

"Kevin doesn't know?" Holly asked.

"No, and I don't want him to. I wish no one knew!" Tristan hated that part of herself.

"But Tris, Kevin of all people should know about this!"

Tristan was adamant. She didn't understand why he should know. She was sorry that Holly had found out.

"I'm getting better, Holly. I'm just trying to forget that episode in my life. It made me crazy for too long. Kevin knows what happened to me, he doesn't need to know about the dreams, too"

Holly didn't tell Tristan that other people knew about the rape. Nick had told her what he knew about it during one of their long and frequent discussions they held under the covers. She decided she was going to mention the dreams to Nick the next morning when he called.

Nick was still a little peeved with Kevin when he saw him the next afternoon. What he had overheard on the phone wasn't his business and he knew that every couple had their little spats from time to time. But he had made her cry. Holly had told Nick about Tristan's nightmares that morning. She hadn't known about Kevin and Tristan fighting on the phone, but Nick felt like he had enough information to figure that Tristan had nightmares when Kevin was shitty to her. It seemed simple to Nick - if Kevin would be nice to her, then she would be okay. He felt like he needed to tell Kevin about these bad dreams but knew it would be difficult. Kevin was very private and certainly wouldn't appreciate Nick knowing something personal about Tristan that he himself didn't already know.

Kevin presented the opportunity later that day when he approached Nick, concerned about his stand-offish behavior at last night's show.

"You and Holly getting along okay?" Kevin asked when they were alone in the hotel gym.

Those few words were probably difficult for him since he tried not to pry into other people's lives. A small part of Nick was touched that Kevin had asked.

"Yeah, Kev. Me and Hol are just great. I miss the shit out her, though. Sometimes I think we're like two puzzle pieces that fit together real good, 'ya know what I mean?" Nick looked at Kevin waiting for his response before he went on with this.

Kevin smiled, looking off into space. "Yeah man, I think I do." Kevin paused, still looking away. "I was just a little concerned. You seemed to have something on your mind last night." He started to do curls with twenty pound weights.

Nick sighed. It was now or never. He just wished that Kevin would put those weights down before he started.

"I did, Kev....well, I do."

"Want to talk about it?" Kevin didn't slow his rhythm.

"I don't know....It's about Tris...and you."

Kevin stopped curling and let the weights hang at his side.. He turned slowly towards Nick, looking like he was already preparing to get pissed. But his voice remained calm.

"What is it, Nick?"

"Well, I got kinda pissed hearing you on the phone with Tris last night and...."

Kevin slammed the weights down on the racks.

"You were listening to out private conversation? I always gave you more credit than that, Nick!"

"Hey, man - you were pretty loud. It was kinda hard to miss! We all heard some of it!"

"Great......"

"Look, Kev, you did sound pretty harsh and that part about screaming your name, well......"

"Nick!" Kevin was pissed now, no doubt about that. "I swear to God, Nick! Tristan and I are gonna have to have you over so you can videotape us in bed. You seem to have such a fascination with our sex life! Maybe you'd better just worry about taking care of Holly."

Nick got up from the bench and faced off with Kevin.

"I do take care of Holly, Kevin! She's not the one who's having nightmares!"

Kevin stared at Nick in disbelief. "What the fuck do you know about that? No one knows about that!"

Now it was Nick's turn to stare. "You know?"

"What the hell do you think? Of course I know. The question is, how do you know?"

"Tristan said you didn't know!"

"Tristan! Did she talk to you about this?" The look on Kevin's face turned from anger to hurt.

"No, man...no. Tristan never said anything."

"Who then?...Mutt?"

"Mutt?....no!...Holly told me."

"Holly?" Kevin started pacing. He was confused and he didn't like being confused. He felt like he was losing control of one more little piece of his life with Tristan.

"Kevin! Calm down!" He was overreacting, which had become all too common lately. "Listen to me! Tristan had one of those dreams last night after your call. Holly heard her, came in and woke her up. Tris was upset. She even threw up. It scared Holly to death, too. Tristan told Holly about the nightmares. Holly told me. I didn't talk to Tris about this, but she told Holly that you didn't know. I just thought that you should, man! I'm not trying to get into your shit!"

Kevin sat down on the bench opposite Nick and put his head in his hands.

"Jesus...I guess I really fucked her over pretty good last night. I never heard of her getting sick before."

It still didn't make much sense to Nick. He spoke softly to Kevin.

"How come Tris thinks that you don't know about this? You must have been around when she's had these things."

Kevin stared at the floor. "I can...ease her out of them before she wakes up. She doesn't even remember having one then. I haven't seen one of those fuckers for a long, long time. I thought maybe they were over."

"I guess not." Nick said, sitting down next to Kevin.

"I'll call her tonight. She'll be alright."

"From what Holly said, Tris doesn't seem to have these things when she's with you, Kevin. You must make her feel pretty secure or something."

Kevin smiled sadly. "But I'm not with her, am I Nick?."

CHAPTER 49

A magazine called "Reputations" began badgering Tristan for an interview. She wasn't totally familiar with the periodical but assumed it wasn't a professional publication. When she asked why they wanted to talk to her, she was told that they were planning a special issue for November about celebrity relationships and wanted her input.

Tristan turned the ring on her finger. She was uncomfortable talking to these borderline rags about Kevin and herself. When she politely declined the interview, the editor became short with her implying that they would publish with or without her cooperation and that she and Kevin would be included in the special issue. He hinted that it might be to her advantage to talk to them.

Kevin hadn't had a private moment all day but decided to call Tristan anyway. Hopefully their conversation wouldn't be a repeat of the last one. For some reason, this tour was really working on him and he thought that maybe they should have taken a longer break. He'd received three messages from Tristan which he had just heard for the first time. He had meant to call her but hadn't been able to find a minute where he could even think. It had been one hell of a day - not one thing so far was going well. Someone at the hotel had leaked their room numbers, the sound check had screwed up, one of the male dancers had sprained an ankle - the list didn't end. On top of all that, the group had decided to renegotiate their label contract. Kevin was a walking bundle of nerves although he almost always appeared to be cool and collected. The phone rang as he was reaching for it.

"Kevin?"

"Hey Tris. I was just about to call you."

"You were?" Tristan sounded skeptical. "I've left messages. Didn't you get them?"

"I just got around to checking them I haven't had a minute today."

"I'm glad it wasn't life or death then." Kevin detected a note of sarcasm.

"What is it Tris? Is something wrong?" God, I hope not - just what I need today..

"Not exactly. Some magazine wants to interview me."

"Good for you. What's the problem?"

"They want to interview me about us." Tristan wasn't sure what Kevin's reaction would be, especially after their last phone call.

"Do what you want, Tris." Kevin rubbed the back of his neck. "Just handle it, okay?"

Tristan detected the impatience in his voice. "Sorry I bothered you Kevin. I just thought you'd want to know."

"You didn't bother me. Tris. Jesus....Are you okay? Feeling better?"

"Yes...I think I just have a little bug. Probably the flu."

They were silent for a moment and then he heard Tristan burst into tears for the second time in as many days.

"Tristan? Baby, what's wrong?" Kevin paced, running his hands through his hair.

"Noth...nothing....I don't know. I guess I'm just edgy." She paused and Kevin heard her catch her breath. "I miss you, Kevin. I...I want you to spoon me."

Kevin smiled in spite of Tristan's tears.

"Aw, baby...I'd like to do more than that.." Kevin remembered their last night together and felt a shifting in his groin. "Come on out here, Tris. I'll spoon you to death!"

Tristan giggled a little between sniffles. "I can't.", she sighed. We start selection for the chorus tomorrow. Christmas concert, remember?"

Kevin frowned. "Oh yeah...I remember."

Tristan heard a woman's voice in the background. "Kevin, hon, they're ready to re-do the sound check."

"Who was that, Kevin?"

Kevin hesitated. "Lily."

"Lily? Where are you?"

He thought Tristan sounded accusing. "I'm backstage, Tristan. Where the hell did you think I was?"

"How would I know - hon?"

"Don't tell me you're worried about Lily and me!. God damn, Tristan!"

"I don't trust her!"

"Then how about trusting me, Tris? Lily's been fine - no problems. She's been very professional and she asks about you, too!"

"Does she now? How sweet! Why are you defending her, Kevin?"

"I'm not defending anyone, including myself! Get a grip! I've got to go, they're waiting for me."

"Kevin...."

"I'll try to call you tomorrow. Good-bye, Tris."

Lily stood behind a thin partition and smiled.

********

Nick and Holly spoke to each other almost daily. They were both worried about the vibrations which seemed to surround Kevin and Tristan these days. Holly talked to Tristan and Nick tried to get to Kevin, then they would compare notes. Nick thought Tristan should take some time to come be with Kevin while Holly thought that Kevin should try to be more supportive of Tristan's career like she was of his. Tristan hadn't told Holly about the kind souls who had been sending her pictures of Kevin since their phone calls. Pictures of Lily and Kevin - Lily with her hand on Kevin's back while he looked down at her actually smiling, pictures of them rehearsing the more "touchy" dance numbers, pictures of the entire group entering a hotel lobby where Lily was handing something to Kevin and he was reaching out to accept it. She didn't know why she was feeling so insecure. Tristan wished she was back in Kentucky with Kevin.

Kevin was wound up tight, too. Lily had been acting decently, but he had no feelings towards her. The tour was wearing him out and he often found himself thinking about Kentucky, picturing Tristan and himself there. Not too many more weeks before that dream could become a reality. He had called a music store in Lexington and arranged to have a baby grand delivered to their home. It would be a surprise for Tristan. He imagined her playing in front of the fire in her pink camisole. Kevin pulled the camisole out of his bag and crawled into bed. He had reached a point where he couldn't sleep without that piece of pink satin against his face.

*******

Mike had continued to stay away from Kevin but he got frequent reports from Lily. She told him that Kevin was edgy and worn out. Good! The weaker he is, the easier this will be. He wondered what Tristan's reactions to the pictures of Kevin and Lily had been. She must not have told Kevin about them - no word had come to him that Kevin knew anything about them.

Mike's relationship with "Reputations" had proven to be more than he had hoped for. He had just received the galleys for the next issue that was to hit the stand the first of November. He was happy to see that they were using many of the photographs he had given them. It was already near the end of October and time to pay Tristan a little visit. He had waited until that Holly woman had gone to see Nick. He didn't want any guardian angels around Tristan when he went to see her. Besides, he might have to go to work on Nick and Holly later on. The thought gave him a perverse thrill.

Mike called Tristan at the symphony one morning requesting a meting with her. Tristan didn't like the feeling she got from Mike's call considering Kevin's feelings. She really didn't want to talk to him.

"It's important that I see you, Tristan."

"Why?" Mikes visits always tended to leave her upset.

"It's personal. We need to talk."

"If you insist Mike. Can you come by here, now? I have an appointment later this morning." Tristan sighed and felt queasy. From the tone of his voice, he didn't have good news.

"I think we'd better do this privately. Will you be home this afternoon?"

"Is this about Kevin? Because if it is, I think...."

"No.", Mike interrupted. "Not directly. This is about you."

Tristan made arrangements to meet Mike and hung up the phone, confused and anxious.

********

"Hello. Tristan." Mike looked disturbed and serious. He carried a small portfolio under his arm. He brushed past Tristan and went into the dining room, laying his portfolio on the table.

"What do you have there, Mike?" Tristan asked walking up beside him. He didn't answer right away.

"Have you gotten any calls from a magazine called "Reputations"?" Mike sounded impatient and angry.

"Well...yes. But I didn't talk to them, really. They wanted an interview but I'm not so sure why. They said something about an article on celebrity couples for the November issue." Tristan was totally lost. What did Mike know about the magazine?

"I came here to warn you, Tristan. To warn you and I guess to say 'I told you so'. I've received the galleys from that issue. It's supposed to hit the newsstands next week." Mike slowly opened the portfolio.

Tristan looked at the top sheet in a state of mild shock. Here was the cover of the November issue and Tristan was the cover girl. The photograph was from an old shoot, one that her agent had recommended be slightly saucy, the plan being to help rid classical music of it's snobbish and boring reputation. This photograph was actually an out take, as Tristan recalled. It showed her in a short red dress, sitting in front of a piano. The thing that made the picture provocative was the fact that she was actually straddling the bench in that short dress and leaning forward, laughing. She remembered the day of the shoot. The photographer had been a reputable woman well known for her portraits. Someone had turned on a huge fan used for photographing wind effects. The photographer had said something funny. Tristan couldn't remember what. The total effect, although innocent, appeared sexual. Here she sat, straddling the bench in a short dress, her thighs open, long hair blowing in the breeze and leaning forward so that a large portion of her ample breasts were visible. It was the type of picture that some women might want their lovers to have, but not the type that went on public display. This one would be on newsstands across the country.

The general theme of the issue was also shocking. Most of the articles advertised on the cover had the word 'whore' in them. "Are you a Whore?" provided the reader with some sample questions they could answer in order to determine their social/sexual status. "Famous Whores in History" promised a serious and educational look at whoredom through the ages. Tristan was trying to make the connection between her photograph on the cover and the subject matter inside and then she saw it. Across the bottom of the cover was the titillating blurb: "Backstreet Whores! Which Ones Qualify?"

Tristan thought she might be sick. She flopped down at the table, beads of perspiration forming on her brow. She looked up to Mike. He looked grim. He flipped the pages to a six page spread that featured each of the guys pictured with the current woman in his life. The first featured was Howie. The writer determined that his girlfriend had failed the "whore" test. She didn't live with Howie and, in fact, didn't spend all that much time with him. The pictures used in this section were older ones and had probably been seen by anyone with an interest in Howie's love life.

The second section showed Brian and Leighanne. Again, she was independent and, according to their research, self supporting. No real whore here either. AJ and Amanda were next. Although the article seemed to concentrate on physical appearance here, it noted that even though Amanda looked like a whore. she didn't qualify either. She and AJ weren't a regular couple. They both saw others from time to time and Amanda lived in her own apartment. AJ's mom lived with him, for Pete's sake!

Tristan began to wonder if this article was some kind of lost leader used to entice potential buyers of the magazine but not following through on it's innuendoes. Her eyes went to a story about Nick and Holly. This article was slightly more leading. It told of Holly leaving the Atlanta Symphony and how she seemed to be practically living with Nick. But, like the others, research showed that she took care of herself for the most part and that their relationship was fairly recent. The accompanying photos were innocent, almost sweet.

Tristan was still puzzled over Mike's attitude until he flipped the sheets again to the final article. It appeared they were saving the best for last. Emblazoned across the pages in large point type was the phrase, "And The Winner Is...Tristan Mallory!" Tristan actually felt faint. She closed her eyes for a moment at which time Mike took the opportunity to let the grin escape his lips. There were pictures - lots of pictures. The ones that had shown up on the internet were there as well as one of her in the kitchen wearing only underwear and one of her in their bedroom slipping on a pair of stockings. The worst one, however, took up more than half the page. It was the picture of her with Kevin in the pool. There was also a smaller picture of her and Asa together with a caption that insinuated that her favors were not exclusive to Kevin.

The pages ended with the "Are You a Whore?" test. Tristan was used as an example in order to demonstrate how to answer the questions provided. There were only a few questions but her profile showed check marks on the "yes" boxes after each one.

Mike looked at Tristan ready to give a final blow if needed. Tears ran down her face as she tried to find her voice. He was not being sympathetic. He had to make sure she understood the impact this could have on Kevin's career.

"Mike, what is this? Why are these people doing this?" She looked like a child asking why her puppy had died.

Mike was cold in his response. "This is called selling magazines, Tristan. I told you that you had to watch things. I was thinking mostly about the fans at the time but obviously, it's this type of gossip that the general public feeds on."

"But it's not true, Mike! Can't this be stopped? Can't they be sued for this or something?" Tristan had tears falling down her face. A couple splashed onto the galleys.

"Tell me what's not true Tristan! Are the pictures doctored? No. Are you saying that's not you and Kevin groping each other in the pool with your tits in his face?"

Tristan's sorrow turned to shock. Mike would have never dared speak to her like this before. "Do you think I'm Kevin's whore, Mike?"

"Listen to me, Tristan. I like you. I really do. But Kevin is my client - not you and I have to be concerned with his image and the image of those he associates with!"

"Associates with? Is that what we are - associates?"

"No! Just answer the questions, Tristan!" Mike grabbed the page containing the "whore" test. Do you live under Kevin's roof? Yes. Do you eat at Kevin's table? Yes. Does Kevin clothe you? Yes, to some degree anyway. Do you share his bed?" Mike paused here. "Well, do you, Tristan?" She nodded blankly and Mike smirked. "Yes. Does he pay personal bills on your behalf, such as medical?"

"NO!" Tristan shouted. "Absolutely not!"

"Are you sure?", Mike asked slyly.

"My medical bills are forwarded to my business manager who pays them through my account. They don't even come here."

"Have you checked your account lately?", Mike asked.

"Well....no. He balances it for me."

Mike reached into his pocket and threw down a small stack of statements.

"You should keep up with your business, Tristan. Kevin made sure after you were hospitalized that all such personal bills were to be paid by his business manager. Your bills never even got to your man. Guess you didn't know that your last pap smear was courtesy of Kevin Richardson!"

"Can he do that?"

"He did do it, Tristan." Mike turned to leave and then stopped. "Looks like you passed the whore test with flying colors, Tris. You are indeed a kept woman. A kept woman with a ruby ring, maybe, but still kept."

Mike slammed the door on his way out and tried very hard to keep himself from skipping to his car. If all continued to go well, his work was virtually done.

Tristan still sat at the table staring in disbelief at the pages scattered before her. She twisted her ring around her finger. Could it be true that, by definition, she was considered Kevin Richardson's whore? If that were true, what did that make Kevin? And more importantly, what would it make their baby? Tristan had just found out that morning that she was almost eight weeks pregnant.

Tristan Trilogy - Story I

"Will You Play for Me?" is a work of fiction.
The characters and events portrayed are fictitious.
Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental.

~BEST VIEWED ON 800 X 600 SCREEN RESOLUTION~

Fiction by Grace